health

Sick, depressed, and busy

I haven’t updated in a while and I apologize. There has been a lot running through my mind. This week, on Monday, I saw the neuropsychologist and a lot of what he said didn’t resonate with me and it made me feel depressed and hopeless. He said that my left brain had been affected and that the language and spatial capabilities are below average. He also told me that my driving capabilities might have been affected during these last two seizures which they weren’t. How do I know? I had got really upset with my father and took my car out up the street, nothing changed. I know that he knows what he is talking about, but I feel that I can prove these people wrong. I feel that I am back in elementary school where the teachers are calling me dumb. And I know this guy isn’t, but that’s how I feel.

On top of this, I got sick from my father the other day. Today, my nephew comes over for the night, which is going to be nice. It has been a long while since we have had him over. We just get to see him two times a week. So it’s nice to have him over, but I have to be careful with being sick still. I’m better, but it’s lingering.

Lately, I honestly have felt trapped in my feelings of depression and anger and sadness. I just don’t know what to do. I was finally able to draw again. Which it has been months. I’m getting excited about a few things, but I just still feel caught. I hate feeling this way and I hope I will get out of it soon. Anyway, that is what is going on now.

Serenity

health

What doesn’t set off a migraine?

So I ended up going to the E.R. on Saturday. They ended up giving me I.V. fluids and a strong medicine for nausea which pretty much kicked it out, but I am still having some pain. Not as much thank goodness. The hospital did send me home with some information on what might set off a migraine. Some of the foods include: chocolate, yogurt, cheese (especially aged). What the hell man? I’ve been eating chocolate yogurt from Yoplait, so I guess that will have to be stopped for a while. Ya’ll aren’t going to stop me from eating cheese, but I do need to reduce my intake. I just wonder, what doesn’t set off a migraine? Goodness. Maybe I caused it. I was doing so good before it came on. The daiths were working, and still are. This is crazy. Gotta do some research.

Serenity

health

What a damned migraine

I haven’t been active. This is mainly because there has been a lot going on in my life. Outside and inside factors, if you get my meaning. Well last Saturday was my birthday. I’m 35 now. Sunday, I woke up with a very bad headache. Bad enough that I had to put an ice pack on. This headache, or migraine, as I think it is, has not gone away since then. I have tried a variety of medicines and my doctor sent me in a new one and even that hasn’t worked. So I’m teetering on the edge of whether to go to the E.R. I’m going to give it one more night. I mean it’s been going on since Sunday! I have my limits you know! I just don’t know what to do about this monster. We’ll see.

Serenity

health

Depressed

Well I’m sorry I haven’t written in a while. Usually in the middle of the month I have some trouble with depression. Yesterday I went to my neuropsychology appointment. It started from 8:30 till about 3:00 with a break of about an hour for lunch. It was tough. We played memory games that had my brain working hard. I won’t know what my results are till we go back in on the 12th of June.

But anyway, back to the depression. I’ve just been feeling terrible lately. Some people think that you just can pick yourself up and go on. Or that it will disappear or that your lazy. Or maybe trying to get attention. I just can’t seem to get going. That’s how I feel anymore. I’m not excited about the things that I usually love to do and I find that I sleep to much or too little. I’ve got 14 days till my birthday and I am excited about that, but I’m just feeling so depressed anymore. I hope this feeling disappears. Anyway, talk soon.